GCP had breakfast today with a longtime friend who offered a bit of valuable parenting insight which we want to pass along. She is the mother of three children and runs a non profit organization dedicated to educating economically disadvantaged children. We were trading stories about our (college aged) sons at breakfast, and shaking our heads as we focused on our worries about their well being. In the midst of this collective hand wringing, my friend says: “We need to stop worrying about these kids. Kids on crack cocaine and having babies as teenagers–we need to worry about them. But anything less serious than that, we need to just chill out”.
Hearing that snapped us out of our free floating worry, and we moved on. But I thought about my friend’s comments throughout the day. How right she was to remind us that we can get so tied up in focusing on what is not right with our sons that we lose track of all that is right. We need to step back every once in a while and just be happy with the knowledge that that they are safe, sound, and solid. Of course we want the best for them and get frustrated when we don’t see them doing their best. But the next time you are at wits end, take a moment to refocus your perspective. The both of you will be glad that you did.